How to: Remove a Tattoo

Wed, 25 July 2012 10:47AM

I am no fortuneteller, but I have taken the time to add up data from my ‘Internal Survey’ and ‘Gut Instinct-ometer,’ and I predict you will regret that tattoo at some point in your future.

Whether it’s fleetingly when you can’t cover it up for that work interview next week, or achingly when you team up with the blue rinse set for a game of Bridge in the year 2063.

God knows I’ve been on the brink of ink before. Unfortunately, it was something to do with the initials/birthplace/favourite Indian dish of an ex.

Fortunately, I didn’t go through with it.

Yes, it can be done well. Jessica Alba has a subtle pic on the nape of her neck and Lana Del Ray sports a wee ‘M’ on her hand, but spare a thought for Nicole Richie who has ‘Virgin’ emblazoned on her inner-wrist (um, she’s a mother of two) and Heidi Klum who now has to rub sunscreen into an entire forearm of ‘Seal’ during her first summer as a single woman.

So think before you ink. Or better yet, opt for a removable version like glam by Manicare Avant-Garde Collection body tattoos, $9.95, from Priceline on August 1st. There’s a bow! There’s a swallow! There’s even a butterfly that can hang around for as long as you like, and disappear down the sink an instant when you don’t.

For those who have already taken the inky plunge, don’t regret it. But if you do want to delete it, here are some facts for you.

• It’s okay to regret the rose tattoo; Megan Fox famously had her Marilyn Monroe tattoo (laboriously) zapped, Angelina erased her former flames name and Mark Wahlberg took his kids to watch the removal procedure – which took 20 sessions – saying it was like “getting burned with hot bacon grease … Hopefully that will deter them.”
• You may remove the tattoo and be left with a scar or hyper-pigmented skin its place. Although laser tattoo removal with q-switched lasers is currently the most common and effective way of removing or fading tattoos, it’s not proof-proof. In other words, the ink may be erased but the skin may live to tell the (faint) tale.
• How is it done? Well the removal lasers emit super high energy in short pulses. This ‘shatters’ and breaks down the ink. These particles are then removed by the bodies’ immune system. Showing, once again, that our bodies’ capabilities are G.E.N.I.U.S. Whether you should ask this much of said body – and what the long-term after-effects actually are – remains to be seen.
• It usually takes 10 – 20 sessions to remove a tattoo completely, which even a gorilla could equate to a sizable amount of money (the price per session is around $350+), even bigger investment of time and a massively impressive pain threshold.
• You are not alone in the process however. Anesthetic creams and/or injections are administered to numb the skin as much as possible, but did I mention there is a limit to how many – or how much of each – tattoo can be worked on per session? You may want to hold those calls…
• In closing, I urge you to only ever get tattoos removed from a reputable doctor. Some day spas and beauty salons offer the treatment, but do check out the credentials of the doctor removing tattoos. This is your precious, beautiful body we are talking about Primpettes. How you adorn it is your deal, but if you do decide to erase the ink, make sure you think first.

What about you? Do you have a tattoo you love/loath?

Have you had one erased?

ecb x

Posted by: ecb

• Previous //
• // Next

Comments (12) Print Send to friend Share

Tags: celebrity tattoo, heidi klum tattoo, how to, tattoo, tattoo removal